The 3-3-3 Rule for Child Anxiety: A Simple Tool Memphis Parents Can Use Right Now
- Alliance Healthcare Services
- 1 day ago
- 4 min read
When your child's worry starts spiraling, this grounding technique can help bring them back to the present moment.
Your daughter is sitting in the backseat, hands shaking before her first day at a new school. Your son can't fall asleep because he's convinced something bad will happen.
Your teenager is breathing fast in the parking lot, refusing to go into the birthday party.
As a parent, watching your child struggle with anxiety feels helpless. You want to fix it but sometimes you just need a tool that works right now.
What Is the 3-3-3 Rule?
The 3-3-3 rule is a simple grounding technique that helps interrupt anxious thoughts by redirecting attention to the present moment. Here's how it works:
Name 3 things you can see. Look around and identify three specific objects. A blue backpack, a stop sign, a bird on a wire.
Name 3 things you can hear. Listen carefully for three distinct sounds. A car passing, the hum of an air conditioner, someone talking in the distance.
Move 3 parts of your body. Wiggle your fingers, roll your shoulders, stomp your feet.
That's it. Three steps. Takes about 30 seconds.
Why Does It Work?
When anxiety takes hold, your child's brain gets stuck in "threat mode." Their thoughts race toward worst-case scenarios, and their body responds as if the danger is real. Even when it isn't.
The 3-3-3 rule works by forcing the brain to shift gears. Instead of focusing on worried thoughts about what might happen, your child has to pay attention to what is happening right now.
This sensory focus interrupts the anxiety cycle and gives the nervous system a chance to calm down.
Research supports the building blocks of this technique. Studies show that sensory-based grounding and mindfulness approaches consistently reduce feelings of distress.
While there aren't randomized trials specifically on the 3-3-3 rule itself, the University of Rochester Medical Center confirms that sensory grounding techniques can be effective tools for managing overwhelming emotions.
Making It Work for Kids
The beauty of the 3-3-3 rule is its simplicity—but younger children might need a playful twist to engage with it.
For younger children (ages 4-8): Turn it into a game. "Can you find three things that are green? What are three sounds you hear, maybe an animal sound?" Adding an element of play makes the technique feel less like a chore and more like a fun distraction.
For older children and teens: Keep it straightforward. Explain the science behind why it works. Teens often respond well to understanding why something helps, not just being told to do it.
Practice when they're calm. The best time to learn the 3-3-3 rule is before anxiety hits. Practice it during peaceful moments so it becomes automatic when stress arrives.
When the 3-3-3 Rule Isn't Enough
Here's what we want every Memphis parent to understand: the 3-3-3 rule is a coping tool, not a cure.
It's excellent for short-term, situational anxiety. The nervous moments before a test, the worry before a doctor's appointment, the fear of trying something new.
But if your child's anxiety is frequent, getting worse, or interfering with daily life, a grounding technique alone won't be enough.
The Anxiety and Depression Association of America reports that anxiety disorders affect nearly one in three adolescents. It affects 31.9% of adolescents. Many children also struggle with co-occurring conditions like depression, trauma responses, or behavioral challenges. These situations require professional support. Alliance can help.
When to Seek Help
Watch for these signs that your child may need more than at-home strategies:
Anxiety that happens most days, not just occasionally
Avoiding school, activities, or friends because of worry
Physical symptoms like headaches, stomachaches, or sleep problems
Panic attacks or intense fear responses
Talk of self-harm or not wanting to be alive
Aggressive behavior that seems connected to overwhelming emotions
If you're seeing these patterns, trust your instincts. Your child deserves support from professionals who specialize in young people's mental health.
Help Is Coming to Memphis: The Children & Youth Wellness Center
At Alliance Healthcare Services, we've spent over 50 years serving Shelby County families. We know what happens when children in crisis have nowhere to turn. Too often they end up in emergency rooms that aren't fully equipped for mental health, or they wait months for an appointment while their struggles intensify.
That's why we're opening the Children & Youth Wellness Center in April 2026.
Think of it as a mental health emergency room designed specifically for children and teens ages 4-17.
It will be the first of its kind in Shelby County. A 24/7 crisis stabilization facility where families can walk in anytime, no appointment needed, and receive immediate, compassionate care.
Located at 602 Malcomb Street in Memphis, directly across from our adult Crisis Wellness Center, the Children & Youth Wellness Center will offer:
Immediate crisis assessment and stabilization. Professional evaluation within minutes, not hours
15 beds for short-term stabilization. A safe place for your child while they stabilize
Individual and group therapy. Evidence-based, trauma-informed treatment
Family support services. Because when your child is in crisis, your whole family needs help
Discharge planning that works. Connections to schools, ongoing therapy, and community resources before your child leaves
Our model is proven. We've been operating the adult Crisis Wellness Center (literally across the street) since January 2025, diverting thousands of individuals from emergency rooms and jails into appropriate mental health care.
Now we're bringing that same approach to the children of Memphis.
You're Not Alone
Parenting an anxious child can feel isolating. You wonder if you're doing something wrong, if you should push them harder or give them more space, if this is "just a phase" or something more serious.
Here's what we want you to know: seeking help isn't giving up on your child. It's giving them every possible advantage.
Start with the 3-3-3 rule. Practice it together. And if you find that coping tools aren't enough, know that help is on the way.
Need help right now?
Call 24/7:
Alliance Healthcare Services Crisis Line: 901-369-1410 (24/7)
Walk-In 24/7:
Children & Youth Wellness Center 602 Malcomb Street, Memphis, TN
Opening April 2026
No child will be turned away due to inability to pay.
This is the first post in our series on children's mental health. Coming soon: "What Triggers Anxiety in Children? Understanding the Signs" and "When Your Child Is in Crisis: What Memphis Parents Need to Know."
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